So, now I know. Just the result I did not want and to be honest which I also did not expect. I failed because of the very last part which they obviously did not count at all. I mean I think there were chances that I had written a bit less than the others for lack of time since I had been using an extra sheet to write my provisional edit and I simply did not have the time to copy, to re-write it on the exam sheet when the last 10 minutes commenced. I asked if I could hand in the provisional sheet, and was told no, and it came to scribble down all I could and hand in the test. I kind of panicked. I should have written each and every word directly onto my exam sheet. That was such a major suck fest. Because, at the end of the day, it does not matter, it simply does not count if you reached the approved mark in 3 out of 4 areas – if the 4 goes down as not approved, you failed the whole exam… The one thing that bugs me most is that I really ought to have approved, I really did well in the exam. I had learned a lot, I was up for this exam. I knew the game. I had prepared myself well. The area (the last one, written expression, where you need to write texts on your own) was the one which I really like most and where I let down my guard and that was the one thing I should not have done. I simply was so enthralled with one task we had I kind of forgot about the time… So, basically, the game is over. I had been so happy about the exam, and now this. If I have to wait another year to re-take the exam, I guess I am not going to do it. It has been such a huge tour de force to kind of continue going there, to attend the classes, learn at night, while I was still doing my peak time with my bread job plus another job I had taken on, plus the change of Berno’s time schedule from day to night shift. The kids. All the other stuff. It really sucks big time. I feel so goddamn sad. It is not that I did not have the means to approve the exam. I did. I could have approved the exam no problem… If I had learned too little I would not feel bad now, but it just seems that the exam is just there to only sift out lots and lots of people. The way the final exam result is influenced like that and one´s exam can be destroyed just like that is pretty injust. Damn it. That’s how I feel. I feel really like I should stayed in bed that day. Don’t they want to see that people are trying to learn their language? Don’t they want to give people a realistic chance to reach the approved level? Can’t they see that many people have run out of time? It really intrigues me as being one major sift out without even taking into consideration what people are faced with during exam day, plus without really reaching for the best ones either… Well, that’s just my irrelevant opinion. And besides sometimes, you need an extra 10 minutes to write something that makes sense, and if you’re not given those 10 minutes that does not mean that you’re bad but that the exam sucks and just creates a very unrealistic demarcation line drawn between B2 and C1.
The ones I spoke with all said that the exam was quite difficult. I did not think it was that diffcult I would simply have appreciated to know that you cannot hand in your first copy, but need to directly copy the answers on the exam sheet. Fuck it. Fuck. F.