My father died suddenly past Saturday. We don’t live in the same country. So all in a total rush, we had to fly out to be able to attend the funeral. We left the kids at a friends’ house. Three days gone, two spent almost entirely on the airport, trains and such. I thought a lot about whether I would write the actual reason in this post or not, then decided it would be much better if I did, so here I am, telling you the truth even you don’t know how much this all means to me.

We never had an easy going relationship. It was probably the most difficult relationship on earth, you could have with someone. I loved him, he also loved me, but we were still but constantly fighting, both extremely headstrong and never giving in. We were both pretty much opposed in our views, and due to our strong characters, there was a constant war going on in our family. Unfortunately, I had picked the wrong side. Or rather I was the minority. Basically, this meant I was on my own. We fought often. The last time I saw him was two years and four months ago. Of course, we would fight then again. In between, we would pick up a phone and talk to each other every now and then. It is very difficult for me right now. I always thought I would see him again. I feel stupid for not telling him how I felt. Now it is too late. I can only hope that somehow deep down, he knew I loved him too. We were cut from the same wood and despite appearances, I did love him. Things had gotten difficult. We both hurt each other, I hurt him, and he also hurt me, but that’s water under the bridge now. That was the kind of little world we inhabited. Fighting and never giving in.

So, instead of writing sob stories, and crappy postings drenched in self pity, I made up my mind.

There won’t be any written postings in a while, which includes the promised interviews. I might (or might not) come up with some pictures later on, but that’s about as far as it goes.

Basically, I need a bit of time to think and probably also a bit of rest.

Papa_jung_Landschaft

This picture shows my dad as a young man in Greece.

 

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